I just came back from a week-long family trip to Hawai’i. Anybody who has been at the dojo for a significant time knows that I don’t really go on vacation, and this trip was actually the longest I’ve ever been gone. I prefer to be home at the dojo practicing and teaching martial arts. I am at my maximum level of happiness using martial arts for relaxation and mindfulness when I’m here, constantly reminded to live in the moment.

The trip itself was great. I got to spend time with my family, which varies between love and toleration, but trends more towards love when multiple family members are meditating. We played golf, went snorkeling, hiked up a few mountains and volcanoes and ate lots of good food. Still, I found myself thinking every day, multiple times a day, “I wonder what they’re doing at the dojo…”

Living a Designed Life

The fact is that I have designed my life. Most people, including myself before I began practicing martial arts, never really decide how life will go. We go to school and decide on a job or career and then just kind of go where life takes us. Make no mistake, going with the flow is an important skill and one that we should practice often. Usually, however, we find ourselves completely at the mercy of “whatever happens to us”, being blown this way and that by the wind of the day’s events. Our mental state (relaxation vs tension, happiness vs upset, mindfulness vs zoning out) is most often a result of what happens in life. I talk often about the importance of being able to choose our mental state, mastering our internal environment no matter what the external environment is. Yet it is also important to work on our external environment.

I choose to spend my days doing what I love. I knew when I was 18 that I wanted to teach martial arts. I couldn’t imagine waking up every day and doing anything else without being miserable. So I chose to do whatever I needed to do to make that happen. Starting a business was easier for me than it could have been because of the resources from my parents and Sifu Brown, but it was still full of challenges. Yet I never second-guess this decision or wonder if I should be doing something else with my life. One of the most important pieces of advice I have is to get a job doing what you love. Find something you’re passionate about and get great at it. Someone will pay you to do it.

Vacations

If you choose not to have a career that you love and spend most of your day doing whatever brings you joy, the next best thing you can do is fill your day with mini vacations. Come practice at the dojo using martial arts for relaxation and mindfulness. Meditate. Schedule conversations with people you love. Take a deep, satisfying breath. Be truly present for a delicious meal.

If you go an entire day without doing something on purpose that brings you into the moment and makes you happy, consider it a wasted day. If you go a whole week just waiting for the weekend to get some sanity, happiness is fleeting. If you work a whole year just to get to that next vacation, you’re basically working yourself to death. My invitation is to start or continue using martial arts for relaxation and mindfulness to make every day a vacation.